June

June - my favourite month of the year probably because I am a June baby. Hehe...

Fever on and off since last Tuesday and I am feeling that it hasn't go away. But still going to work. Only took MC last Friday. Actually I did get ready for work but the lift at home spoilt and I don't think I can manage to go down 18 flights of stairs to go to work. I will faint. So I think it's best to stay home and rest. But still my fever is still around *pout*.

Been feeling bitter sweet recently. This feeling of wanting to cry has been around lately especially been crying for few nights continuously while watching Autumn's Concerto. And also with this emotional wave around especially when I am not feeling very well.

3 more episodes to finish but I've returned the DVD to DH as I promised to watch the end part with him as he had stopped watching around episode 17 quite a few months back. Lucky first half whereby all the parts that made me cried, I watched alone. Hopefully the last 3 episodes wouldn't have any parts that make me cry. Watched 3 episodes with him but that part of the movie is quite slow and nothing that is very touching in feeling so I didn't shed any tears. Phew... Lucky.

Love this song from the movie a lot:


Bitter but nice. Previously shared Taylor Swift's Safe and Sound and am still loving it. I think it suits me recently, it sound sad/bitter but at the same time being very strong and at peace. Funnily this type of emotion is always around whenever I am not sure about where I am standing exactly, not sure about my feelings. When everything is so blur. But still I am steady and at peace. I need to keep myself away from such circumstances. One thing I learnt back in 2010 was that I am tough enough to distance myself from someone whenever I have to. Whenever it is becoming unhealthy. And I think I will have to do so again.

This song came in mind. It has accompany through bad times:

"Just gonna stand there and watch me burn. That's all right because I like the way it hurts"
 
"We'll walk this road together, through the storm, Whatever weather cold or warm. Just let you know that you're not alone..."

I love how he mashup 2 songs into 1 - Love The Way You Lie + Not Afraid. And I love the music on the background.

One thing I learn in the process is being alone doesn't necessary means being lonely. At the same time, you can be lonely even though you have a lot of people accompanying you.