Of stares & whispers

I've been getting a lot of stares and whispers lately because of how I looked like.

Yeah. This was an injury I sustained from cycling at Publika as the break was malfunctioning.

With my chin being so bruised, I was afraid to go out. I had to wear a mask to go out as my chin juts out on the right.

Then I decided why should I hide. Do I look that hideous? I went to work on the second day without any mask on. It felt so odd getting stared at. There are times where I noticed people staring at me and when I stared back, they still continue to stare. WTF.

The awkward stares, the way people point fingers and the way people whispers made me feel very insecure even for just a few day. I wanted to hide myself from people. At times I felt like using my hand to cover the bruise when people are looking.

Being at my height, I'm already very insecure. I get stare at, I hear whispers, I get mock yet it's not as bad as now. Being short is not a choice. There's a lot of limitation. I can't reach places that some times it's embarrassing to ask for help. Being cramped in the public transport is the worst at my height if you get what I mean. People don't take me seriously because I look like a kid. Some times I lack self confidence because of all the mockery. It takes a lot for me to build confidence and courage. But I don't want to let them get in my way that I always am tougher than I look. But most of all, I am lucky that not everyone pays attention to my height. Or maybe I got used to it.

However, with a mark on the face, everyone will look. They will pay attention. Then my thoughts went to those who has birthmark or suffered damage to the face. They get all those silent mockery everyday. I felt bad for them. I understand how they feel.

Any way, back to my incident. I was at Publika with my siblings for a family day. It was a fun and happy day. We got our bicycles from Publika management and cycled around the playground area. While we were on our way to return the bicycles, we have to cycle down a slope. Never did I expect that the bicycle's break is not working. I'm force to fall. To the left, I risk being bang by other cyclists. So, I fell to the right but I didn't expect to hit the wall. My chin hit the wall first then my head. My hand scrapped against the wall while my left leg was hit by the bicycle.

 The pictures don't look as clear as my real injury.
It's taken using my phone's front camera.

My hand and leg injuries. The worst part is going to bath.

My sister cleaned my injuries and brought me straight to the clinic at Publika while my brother and 2nd sister returned my bicycle to the management. They were informed yet no action was taken. The nurse cleaned my injuries while the doctor inspected it. However, he can't check for internal injury suffered to the head. So, if I faint, black out or have severe headache, I should go to the hospital for a scan. I have been feeling unwell for the past few days. Is it because I can't sleep or is it because of the head injury? Should I go for a check up?

Any way, I decided to file a report to Publika management. On Sunday itself I left a message on the FB page but there was no reply. I decided to call Publika and managed to file an email report on Tuesday but til date, there's no reply from their end. They should be responsible for it and I wanted a response from them.

Cycling at Publika is a fun thing and a nice family activity. I'm not going to discourage anyone to go there. But be safe and remember to take safety precaution.

It's a Wheelie Sundays at Publika whereby people can go there to cycle

Time: 7.15am - 10.00am
Price: F.O.C

In the morning if you are early, you can cycle longer without registering. However when the crowd is larger, you need to register and can only cycle for half an hour. After that, you will have to return the bicycle.

Updated 30 May 2014
So, I got a call from Publika's management staff called Alex and that they will be responsible for the fall. He asked what do I want from them and they will pay for all my medical fees related to the injury. I requested to get Publika to make sure that they will ensure that all bicycles are in good condition before letting the public use it. He said okay but can't give me an official email to guarantee that :( However, I hope he hold to his verbal promise so that there's no more unfortunate accident like this.